Robert Deveau asked: Many experts say that good communication and friendship forms a more lasting bond between married couples than does sexual attraction. While that may be true, sex is vital to a marriage relationship. Life gets busy. Our attention to work, keeping up a home, and raising children tends to force us to take the focus off of our spouses for extended periods of time. Sometimes sexual urges seem to diminish as we grow used to each other and our sex life becomes routine. Another factor that can cloud our physical passion is medications. Everything from blood pressure medications to antidepressants to contraceptives can have sexual side effects.
It is common knowledge that women take longer to get to the ready-for-sex state than men. A lot of marriage advice in this area puts the spotlight on the men. Keeping the passion flowing takes effort from both partners.
One way a woman can elicit arousal ahead of time is to use her husband’s cologne. Dab a small amount on the back of the hand or on a tissue and take a whiff several times throughout the day. Your sense of smell will arouse feelings of being close to your husband during the day when you are apart.
Gentlemen, stall your engines! You love your wife. You find her very attractive. You want to have sex with her. Wonderful! Don’t just dive in, though. You know that if she is enjoying sex, it causing you to be even more satisfied. Allow the passion to build. Become her favorite masseur. A neck or back rub, if she enjoys that kind of thing is a wonderful propellant to intimacy. Your wife needs to be relaxed and stress free in order to enjoy sex.
For both husband and wife, take care of yourselves. Get moving. Exercise gets the heart pumping at an optimum rate increasing circulation. Watch your diet, resolve to eat healthier together. Do not slack on appearance either, frump and sloppiness is not attractive even if you have been married 50 years. Take care to look nice for your spouse.
As for some of those medications that you may take to keep up your health, ask your doctor for advice for help in dealing with the sexual side effects.
While you are taking care of the emotional and psychological side of your relationship, don’t neglect the physical side.
